Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Life is

Life's too short to finish the 735 things on my to do list, too short to reach enlightenment by meditation, too short to become in peace  with myself, to hang out with friends all the time,to read every book that was suggested to me by a friend, to learn about all the religions of the world , to study philosophy, to become rich and powerful and change the world by that power, to watch every documentary on national geographic and vice news and to learn Latin, French, and Italian.
Obviously, it's impossible to do all these things in one day, which is why I run away and hide under my blanket raging a webtoon.
I've fallen a victim to procrastination, and I've lingered in my comfort zone for so long that anything else would be considered of anguish and hardship.
But may be, just may be, I'm looking at"life" differently. I am talking about "life" but I'm probably thinking of "today".
Perhaps If I prioritize my goals I'd be able to achieve at least one of them.... And that would mean the work to me, I'd feel productive and would value myself some my time, and above all, I'd be happy.
After, all you need is a willing heart.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014

How Ghandi impacted my life

A few years ago I read Ghandi's autobiography without finishing it. And now, as I started to read it again from the beginning, I realized how much his words influenced me without knowing the total effect. It supported certain ideas the one that comes to mind is how unnecessary  sometimes is  to use any method of transport,be it public or not, as it can be substituted by walking.

His short-mentioned encounter with Nariyan Hemchandra also became a base for not caring about my looks as much.

He got me back in touch with spirituality and now I'm planning on reading Tolstoy's  "the kingdom of heaven is within you"

Looking back,I now know how many times I tried to implement Satiyagraha, non-violence, into my life.z however I doubt I was successful; I still lose myelf when I'm angry and I still am accused of being aggressive whenever I become excited in any discussion. I should add that I'm not angry in those discussions, I'm actually toi passionate in attempting to explain myself ,my thoughts and my point of view to the person in front of me that I seem emotionally unchecked.
And as much as I find it spiritually levitating I don't think it's possible to apply it in real life. To me Ghandi was lucky, if we applied this in Iraq, most of us would get killed by people of the same country. Besides, what's going on in Iraq now was an eye opener, of all the Iraqis believed in non-violence, which is more fictional than a centaur,Iraq would be wiped away by ISIS.

All in all it's been a great experience as it's the forest biography I read and undoubtly I'll read more insha-Allah.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

I refuse to be happy

One of the things that always makes me happy, is to learn something new.

I remember when I was at my tutor's place as I learned the words "home" and "house" and how befuddled it made me wanting to know the difference between the two words.
Today, I finally lived the difference. I was "home". and as happy as this sounds, this "home" had the vibrating air of laughter, sighs, and weeping in a single hour.
This lesson I now live was for a heavy price. I sincerely wish not learning it if I was aware of the circumstances necessary for it.

And today I refuse to be happy. A few minutes earlier, my body, my spirit seem to reject the smile and responded with a short episode of sobbing.